Barbarella (1967)
 The year is 40,000 AD. Peacefully floating around in
zero-gravity (and taking her clothes off to what sounds like Herb
Alpert and his Tijuana Horns) sexy 41st Century astronaut
Barbarella is suddenly interrupted by a video call from the
boa-clad President of Earth (and rotating premier of the Sun
System), Dianthus.
A young scientist called Durand Durand, is threatening centuries
of universal peace with his Positronic Ray, and Barbarella is the
one chosen to find him and save the stars and mother planet. (and
yes, that is where the 80s group got their name)
Barbarella instructs her ship's computer (Alfie) to fly her
craft Alpha 7 into temporal space (?) and wake her up in 154
hours.
She settles into a see-through bed (affording us a few more
glimpses of her breasts) but is shortly woken by Alfie who
instructs her to "insert nourishment" and promptly
crashes the craft . . .
Barbarella is met by a pair of "cute little girls"
who promptly knock her out with a snowball, tie her up (now we're
talking) and take her off on a set of ski's towed by a manta ray
(!).
In the burned-out shell of Durand Durand's spaceship she finds
herself the entertainment for a group of feral kids and their
walking dolls with razor sharp steel teeth and spring-loaded
mouths.
The dolls start to bite through her flimsy fishnet
clothing (and bits of her body) but all too soon she is rescued by
a macho type in a fur suit with a big whip (Ugo Tognazzi). He is a 'catcher'.
After bonking Barbarella in his sail-powered sled he fixes her
spacecraft and she heads off in search of Durand Durand.
Unfortunately she crashes again moments later, but luckily she
activates the Terrascrew (!) and goes subterranean. Here she meets
Pygar (a handsome angel who has unfortunately lost the will to fly) in the
labyrinth of the City of Night.
Pygar (John Phillip Law) is also blind - which gives him a chance to run his
fingers over her body -oo-er missus! - and is cared for by a chap
called Professor Ping (played by Marcel Marceau in a distinctly
non-miming role).
During a raid on the labyrinth, Pygar rescues Barbarella from
the Black Guard and after bonking Barbarella - her standard method
of repaying those who save her life apparently - he regains
the will to fly.
 He flies Barbarella to the City of Night where she is promptly
kidnapped. Fortunately she is saved by a beautiful woman with an
eye-patch (and a handy knack with a knife). She calls Barbarella
"Pretty pretty" but Barbarella does not want to play and
runs away . . .
She escapes smack bang into the Chamber of
Ultimate Solution where she is invited to "Select from three
exciting and surprising forms of death" hidden behind three
doors.
Should she fail to choose, she will be given to the Matmos - A
lake of living energy in liquid form which thrives on evil, upon
which the entire city is built.
Fortunately she is rescued by the
Concierge to the Great Tyrant. Coming face to face with the Great
Tyrant, Barbarella discovers it is the "little one-eyed
wench" with the knife (Anita Pallenberg - dubbed by Joan
Greenwood).
Barbarella still doesn't want to play so she is thrown to the
birds where more pecking of the clothes and skin ensues. Luckily
she is rescued by Dildano (David Hemmings), Head of the Revolutionary Forces.
Dildano and Barbarella have pill-based "virtual" sex
before she heads off and finally discovers the scientist (Milo
O'Shea) - and gets laid by an organ (an actual organ, with pedals
and keys!).
The Tyrant frees the Matmos (apocalypse) but Barbarella
survives as the Matmos creates a bubble with our heroine inside it
"to protect itself from her innocence".
She is so good
that she makes the Matmos vomit and Durand Durand and the city (and all in it) are destroyed.
Pygar
flies off into the sunset with Barbarella under one arm and Anita
Pallenberg under the other (no wonder he looks happy) and that's
that.
Jane Fonda delivers all her lines with wide-eyed amazement, like
a sexually liberated version of Dorothy Gale in an erotic Oz.
 As a sex object, Fonda is at the absolute top of her game in Barbarella
- fortunately she constantly finds
herself in situations during her mission where it is necessary to lose at least part
of her (already scant) clothing!
The film was made during a long-term love affair between Fonda
and director Roger Vadim, and it shows in every frame.
It's a wonder, wonder woman
You're so wild and wonderful
cause it seems whenever we're together
the planets all stand still
Barbarella psychedella
there's a kinda cockle shell about you
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